Hello hello and Happy New Year! (Kinda late but oh well :P)
I went to the Philippines this past December and had a great time with family. And for the first time, it felt like a vacation with all the adventures that we went on this time around. I’ll leave the details for another time 🙂
But what is this? Quarter life crisis? What?
So, I turn 25 this Saturday. And like I always do, I’m in super reflection mode again. Have I done what I’ve wanted to do in my life so far? Where am I going next? Am I doing everything God wants me to do in my life? You know, little stuff like that. Not heavy or deep at all 😛
In all seriousness, every time I get a chance to think like this, I am challenged to exert myself a little bit more – to step up, to grow, and to find an even greater meaning in my life. I keep looking back a little and think, did I miss out on anything? The parties, clubbing, drinking and hanging out with friends, things of that sort. Do I still want to experience things like that? I keep going back to this train of thought for some reason, but I still don’t want any of it.
I look at all of that stuff… i think a little bit and think about what comes out of experiences like that. Not that I think I’m above it all. but I don’t believe that I become any better or that I live my life a little better after doing things like that. And so of course, after thinking like that, I then think, why the heck do you have to think like that? Just do it cuz you’re young and you can. Do it just because. Do it cuz you might not ever have a chance to do it. But that thought is super fleeting. I think about my bed and the quiet and then just as quickly as I had thought about it, it just as quickly disappears.
What do I want, then? I want to travel. Alone maybe. Maybe with friends too, obviously. I want to find something I’m even more passionate about than nursing, like a cause I really believe in and want to be part of. I want to step into the next phase of my career and figure out where exactly in this big realm of nursing that I want to be part of next. I want to learn another language and spend some time in that country. And I want to see my family happy. I want meaningful experiences. That’s not that weird, right?
Anyway. I look back at what l’ve gone through in my life so far, everything that’s brought me up to this point and this perspective, and I’m just truly thankful. I don’t regret my attitude towards my life, and I hope I can get to a point where I can be 100% confident with the decisions I make for myself and my loved ones.